Stopping the Villain Before They Start

[Music] hello everybody and welcome to we are marvel the mcu marvel cinematic universe focused podcast thank you for joining us my name is jeremy my name is justin hello hi everyone you sound like you’re in a chipper mood i’m enjoying that my my citrus drop has some caffeine i think and i had a sandwich before we started so you know i wasn’t too hungry and there’s a look into justin’s pre-recording regime mean measurement regiment happy to be back glad we’re doing this i feel like it’s been a long time but it hasn’t it’s been like a week yeah this one it’s only been a week this time last time should have felt like a long time it did because it was it didn’t feel as long as it ended up being um but yeah that’s true it was a while but now we’re back on track and the way we ended up with the math this time around we should have an episode every week this month yes yeah which would be pretty nice working out yeah so that’s pretty cool yeah a little a little bit busy for us but that’s okay yeah we’re here to serve yeah we have fun sitting down and recording it it’s been a long time since we’ve done it so yeah we got to catch up i guess that’s true and without much further ado let’s get on with this show yeah so we are going to actually start this one off with just a little bit of uh news so i got i just got a small little a snippet here um so black widow which was set for a theatrical release on may 7th has now been pushed back unfortunately to july 9th uh made available to disney plus subscribers for an extra 30 on the same day like they did with mulan yeah i i didn’t look at how how did that do apparently good enough yeah good point you know and here’s the thing like i didn’t do it for mulan because i didn’t care enough like i got it for christmas and still haven’t watched it like i want to see it but i didn’t care that much i would pay 30 bucks to watch black widow on disney plus yes yeah because if you if you think about it it’s less than what you would spend at a theater yeah that’s what i was going to say yeah depending especially depending on the theater you know some places are obviously cheaper than well it’s because of me and my wife right and i’m assuming the same for you so if you split that 30 and a half 15 a piece it’s pretty close it’s plus it’s pretty close if it is less yeah plus i mean given where we go there’s dinner drinks whatever yeah like you just and the sandwich was from panera wow well now you’re talking pretty pricey okay well you know it’s good stuff it actually is really good i just really should get sponsored by them because that’d be amazing no kidding free sandwiches and soup it’s one of the not to go too far off tangent but these are short episodes anyway it’s one of those things that i always like my wife okay hey let’s get panera and go i don’t know if i want panera and then we get it and i’m so glad we got it because it’s always good it just never sounds good okay there’s got to be like a name or something for that stupid unless there’s a few no send it in there’s got to be something being done all right one one little addition to that um marvel’s shang chi and the legend of the 10 rings has moved to september 3rd boo so a little update on what’s going on with the releases yeah but yeah it’s it’s too bad that we have to wait even longer it will be nice when september finally rolls around because september will have shangchi november i think we’ll have eternals and then december will be spider-man 3. i’m hoping so yeah provided all goes well yeah i’m hoping it’s not a few months and they’re like oh we’re gonna push those too i have a feeling given the state of the world now things are gonna get better maybe not perfect but you know not to get political and i don’t even want to but it’s getting to a place where theaters are opening our theaters are open yeah i don’t know if they’re showing new stuff but they are open i don’t know what they’re showing right now yeah so yeah so you’re right we are moving in and we’re in the right direction for sure yeah so fingers crossed can’t wait and worst case scenario i’ll watch black widow on disney plus for 30 bucks okay the rest of them i want to see in theaters you know because they’re bigger more exciting like [ __ ] a house black widow sorry not not me it’s justin i’ve been waiting over a year for this movie like at this point i just want to see it yeah right it’s like it’s it’s going to be so hard for you to live up to all the hype and weight and all that stuff yeah i mean it’s like i i’ve been a booster for black widow since they announced it i think it’s a great idea but if worst case scenario theaters aren’t quite up to scuff by july and it still comes out hell or high water i’ll watch it on disney plus if i can’t go to the theater all right that’s true and it gives just a good reason to upgrade that surround sound and all that stuff right true like honey we’re not spending it on going out and eating right for dinner and all that in the movie tamira [Laughter] all right well let’s jump into this episode glitch now now as we mentioned at the end of last episode what we decided to do was we’re hoping we’ll have some fun with this but we decided we’re going to go through each movie and just find a way that things that that that could have ended quicker like the bad guy could have been stopped quicker or how you could have stopped them in a short time obviously these didn’t happen because they’re probably dumb yeah and because that would just make a terrible movie right you’re like okay here’s 23 shorts yeah and these are probably going to go quick we might you know elaborate on a few chuckle ask some questions but uh we’re gonna do all 23 so we have a feeling these are going to go pretty fast yeah all right so uh let’s start off with iron man so i i decided to put here uh so if pepper called tony right after she left obadiah’s office then tony could have just suited up right away and oh i wouldn’t have gotten the art director and broke credits pretty much yeah yeah i could see yeah so so she just whatever i mean like from the get-go just hey tony uh bad [ __ ] we would get your suit on and go confront obadiah cause yeah you know that suit that you just built well guess what someone else built a bigger one and it looks worse yeah so there you go and yeah just see it’s stopping before it even gets it on and all that and and boom rope credits yeah yeah i think that sounds fine incredible hulk i think a psychiatrist for emil blonsky would probably weed that problem out and then a dishonorable discharge for general ross um just for being a giant piece of [ __ ] for even back when he was working with bruce and like this vicious manhunt that he was on for what seemed like the better part of a decade trying to hunt him down yeah i think just better screening in the uh the military might have solved this problem very fast i think so i i think for a lot of these it’s uh just you know a therapist or better a phone call yeah stuff like that so uh i think i might actually have one that’s similar just like that so we’ll see when we get to it all right so for iron man 2 uh stark talks things out with vanco just you know have a conversation with him yeah uh and make an alliance with hammer to do projects that don’t involve war machines just you know that’s right normal kind of things like so tony don’t be a dick for a change well yeah i know and and early on tony that’s kind of tough to do because that’s tony with gigantic ego tony i’m the greatest thing alive tony nominee i will take the credit it’s me i am a superhero the greatest superhero possibly of all time or will ever be magician who iron man my next one is thor my first suggestion would be to not banish thor right before the odin coma like you know it’s happening it’s a regular thing especially in the comics like it is a thing that happens a lot you plan for it maybe don’t send them away then because you might need some backup uh and don’t play games with your kids lives you know that would be a thing don’t be a dick to your adopted frost giant baby yeah that’s very cool problem solving not you know not when he’s like four hundred years old but like when he gets into his teen hundreds you go listen just so you know you’re a frost giant you don’t look like one because of magic but you are sorry yeah i said yes again sit down have a talk yeah it’s tough believe me i know it’s tough to have those conversations but it’s just you know you got to do it sometimes all right so for captain america the first avenger maybe don’t give red skull a super soldier serum it’s possible just throwing that out there because he’s already crazy so again you know maybe vet him a little oh he’s a little psycho to be fair erskine was you know stolen by the nazis to do their stuff but maybe give them one that’s poison yeah like yeah i made it perfect except for that arsenic and then oops oh oh sorry about that your red skull exploded yeah you probably don’t want to try this again yeah okay that’s fair um i have avengers the first one uh don’t try using the tester act until you actually know what it does maybe run some small tests see if you can do little things yeah like open a door into the next room maybe grab yourself a soda come back before reaching out to the other side of space yeah now let’s move on to something bigger yeah then other side of space yeah and probably figure out before you get there this isn’t something we should be doing we already know that there’s giant metal monsters that can destroy a small town in mexico like maybe not yeah maybe all right iron man three uh tony meets altruist killian when he promises to maybe i gotta i got a second part here it’s a third one with iron man should just not be a dick yeah yeah just you said you’d meet him don’t be a dick because he never really plans to meet him no or you know schedule for some time not when you’re about to try and get laid just you know say hey busy right now just had it gave a speech drunk partying come by next week yeah yeah join me again next yeah join me in the morning mid morning afternoon and my second part here is uh today could have not given his home address to a psychopath which subsequently causes the destruction of set home and then you’re depriving him of his massive catalog of iron man suits and weaponry and whatnot sure sure you know maybe don’t do that he could have actually worn one of the suits instead of burying it under his house well yeah yeah maybe have a spare upstairs you know in a storage unit not the mark 43 that falls apart if you sneeze too loud yeah all right i got to thor the dark world and uh pretty much don’t let odin make decisions is where i’m at uh and readier armies to destroy the dark elves they’re really not that tough like i know odin is willing to throw every asgardian at malekith’s armies you know to the death but i feel like just batting down the hatches a couple extra swords spears guns you’ll be fine yeah you’ll be okay yeah i like it all right uh this one was kind of a tough one but captain america the winter soldier uh maybe just snipe bucky at the start what and at the end i mean i know he turns out to be a good guy but at the time we didn’t really know like yes but boomers it was a tough one to really find another way i’d say oh you got something okay uh don’t hire ex-hydra agents to help you plan your new secret organization okay yeah i don’t think it was on the resume okay i’m with hydra sola yeah i mean come on now they literally just like brought him in and said hey i know you were working for a nazi but wanna help maybe i’m sure he’s very convincing a little guy with corinthians he’s very charismatic he just can’t eat beef uh guardians the galaxy turn the orb over to the proper authorities instead of a ragtag group of misfits yeah like i i love the guardians they’re a great group but until a little extra training is done i feel like the vast military complex of the nova core could probably have taken care of the problem yeah they like trained for that kind of stuff i would think so yeah i feel like this is going to go a lot faster than i was hoping it would yeah we’re like 10 minutes slower um not like 15 yeah yeah it is gonna be quicker all right so for avengers um this is the age of ultron one i’m gonna do now boom boom boom we won’t spread these out uh so if bruce had said no to making ultron with tony that’d be one possibility sure you know um but okay so let’s decide they do decide to so then tony could i don’t personally supervise the creation of ultron you know not get it started and go have a party yeah yeah you know set something up to kind of monitor a little bit better i know there was jarvis but that obviously didn’t work out yeah yeah not a good one yeah using an evil aliens you know magic staff to create your savior robot might be you know worth yeah yeah i think yes yeah uh ant-man maybe try not putting the psychopath in charge of mind-altering chemicals and dangerous weapons and conduct proper research instead yeah so again kind of vet the guy a little you know ask a few questions hey what do you have planned oh that’s not good you’re gonna make a [ __ ] ton of yellow jacket armors and sell it to hydra that doesn’t really go with our image we’ll get back to you even hank says like he’s wasn’t the most stable guy to begin with maybe fire him instead of giving him your company when you leave i don’t know yeah yeah something like that yeah all right so for captain america civil war all i can really come up with is uh if sam didn’t yell hay at zemo when he was looking down the elevator shaft they probably could have caught him don’t don’t give him that heads up there just maybe sneak down hey you i can’t reach right now i’m stirring stay there don’t you move i’m gonna i’m go oh i’m gonna get you oh dang it he ran shoot every time why don’t i yell from so far away and also steve could have just been honest you know have a little sit down hey guess what i just learned from this evil computer in uh this basement yeah awkward listen i got some bad news maybe you want to sit down for this let me take the suit off lock it up brody can you get the thank you just take this take the kids away yeah just you know small stuff like that yeah uh for doctor strange i feel like they should just have put wong in charge of the library from the start because he seems a lot more formidable than the previous librarian well we don’t we didn’t see what he tried to do i guess he didn’t do much and also maybe secure the more dangerous books with something more than a flimsy ass chain because you’re all magicians and you can just destroy those things with blinking and yeah you know maybe a vault magic fault yeah yeah even even make that flimsy chain a magic chain yeah that you can’t remove not something flimsier than a bike chain which you know teenagers break open just like a thought do they still do that yes they do to me you know i can’t ride my bike anywhere anymore damn kids always take my bike my huffy you were never cool enough to have a hubby i did it was bright ass orange oh wow okay we need pictures it’s in the landfill now oh that’s sad thanks for bringing the show 20 years old hey that’s classic buddy all right so for guardians of the galaxy vol 2 um maybe don’t go with a strange man in a suspicious white egg van [Laughter] you know he says your daddy yeah i know you’re desperate to find your dad but like maybe don’t do it all science point to this guy’s horrible yeah and as soon as they found out he was horrible probably should have left yeah just get out of there you know but yeah you know gotta follow that egg i don’t know that’s what i do uh spider-man homecoming i feel like if they just let tombs disguise finish the work that they were contracted for and then damage control could have just disposed of the alien tech properly instead of housing it in a big-ass warehouse yeah coming in like such dicks that too yeah and that’s the thing like you had this crew that could have taken down all of the extra stuff and then you have damage control come in and be like this alien stuff is a bit above your pay grade worst professionals you knew the menial labor we take care of the high-tech weaponry splitsies splitsies solves everything that’s how we do this show panera i do i did actually no you didn’t not with you you did well yeah all right fair but yeah just you know let them do what they’re already doing yeah they were hired to do yeah yeah they were actually doing a pretty good job of it too they haven’t figured out a way to work around the stuff yeah like use their weapons to take down their weapons it worked yeah it worked they were doing fine yeah all right so this one again was a little bit tough so i just i threw in this sentence that they can just say and it’ll work perfect so this is at the beginning of course so it’s it’s listen to the tour um i’ve looked into asgard’s past and turns out we’re kind of shitty to a lot of people so why don’t you say you just yeah yeah so why don’t you just say you ragnarok all over asgard and we’ll find a new place to live okay thanks you roll credits yeah all right guys you can show it explosion roll credits yeah i mean really everyone on the ship if thor hadn’t incapacitated certa at the beginning of the movie and he had just done what he was supposed to do which he ended up doing anyway yeah yeah yeah they could have saved very many people yeah he could have just all got them all and shipped hey guys uh so we’re just everyone get on the ship this is happening whether we like it or not yeah and uh we found a place on earth it’s very nice all right my father hid the tesseract there many many years ago worked out okay not great yeah i might say okay uh let’s see my next one is black panther um don’t abandon killmonger bring him one to wakanda and raise him correctly yeah what a crazy thought concept there i like maybe don’t be a horrible monster yeah your brother was a traitor fine i get that i understand kill him fine he tried to shoot you [ __ ] happens i get it yeah but take his kid and be like listen your dad did some bad things we don’t want you to come back 20 years from now and do worse things so yeah let’s go this gut feeling you’re going to be real pissed in about 20 years give or take just i mean yeah the kid didn’t do it and you knew he had the kid so yeah and that’s the thing that would have been i think if they had been like we didn’t realize he had a kid yeah then it would be like oh okay well there’s really nothing you could have done because you didn’t know any better but you did know yeah you did you flat out knew and left them there anyway yeah yeah yeah uh yeah i completely agree with that yeah all right so again i got another two-parter here um for avengers infinity war so a uh go for the head done simple simple just boom head gone done all right no snap um but but then i i did some little research and if tony turned the q-ship around and met up with the other avengers in wakanda they might have been able to beat thanos right there because they all would have you know been together not split up yeah um yeah that’s true well that’s kind of the point of the movie is that you know it’s it’s the depart it’s the one time where they’re not unified and together in civil war obviously right and therefore they lose yes yeah which like they did in civil war too really yeah yeah yeah okay i yeah i oh whoa okay oh maybe you should have more sandwich you’re getting angry i have a little more citrus drop oh perfect man we’re gonna get two sponsors i don’t see citrus drop bringing in as much fred meyer it’s fred meyer oh okay sorry god ant-man and the wasp um hank and bill could have worked together from the very beginning to cure ghosts and save janet yeah yeah crazy idea i know guys but hank not being a [ __ ] shock yes it’s weird that he hates tony stark so much when he’s exactly like him but worse yeah well that’s what they say right you hate the people you’re the most alike sometimes is that why i hate you so much oh god is that a compliment or not i don’t know how to take that yes yeah they work together like we are right yeah all right before captain marvel um they could have just talked to the scrolls and then just tell the creator screw off you know okay as most of us wanted we knew the cree were bad we saw it in guardians they’re dicks a bunch of blue faced jerks that’s what they are apologies to any blue-faced jerks out there you’re only saying this for the show comedic effect comedic effect jude law is a jerk in almost half of the things he’s in except for when he’s a good guy so you know there’s that i don’t yeah i have to take your word for it because he’s been in quite a few things that’s true uh for avengers endgame don’t let nebula anywhere near a place or time she could run into an alternate version of herself yeah boop like she’s a computer person like you your brain is a computer wouldn’t you would think tony would be like hey wait a second i know computers pretty well if you’re in the same vicinity as yourself you might you know come in contact with yourself like it would register that you’d be on the same like wavelength or whatever yeah yeah and that’s no good no yeah and that’s the thing if she had gone to literally any other time and place it would have been fine it would work perfectly thanos would have had no [ __ ] clue yeah yes i mean yeah like we’re saying like yeah boring movie but i mean that would have been the solution fair enough all right and uh our last one here all right so spider-man far from home uh tony stark talks things out with back instead of firing him but that wouldn’t get you know of course like we mentioned before involved tony not being a dick yeah that’s the ultimate oh obstacle to overcome i feel like they’re that definitely a common tony stark theme and hank pym yeah just i got i got a second part to that one though okay but yeah it’s yeah don’t be a dick and and you’re addicted to a lot of people as they show us in the movie yeah um so for the second part they you know tony could have also not you know given a pair of world-ending sunglasses to a teenager or at least you know put happy or pepper as maybe admins to it sure okay you can’t do that um so i’ll just hit no to that no permission denied on that one sorry yeah like some sort of fail safe so that he’s not even if he didn’t give him to back one of the first things he does is order a drone strike against uh what’s his face flash yeah like that’s a kid still yeah like i know he’s technically in his twenties in real life but in this he’s like 16. yeah don’t maybe don’t put him in charge of killers yeah yeah or without again having happy pepper being given the okay yeah uh you wanna who flash he’s a teenager uh we’re gonna have to hit no on that one sorry yeah you can draw a strike back all you want drone strike him to death big time but maybe not your classmates that’s that’s a bad road to start going down well that went quick that went real quick yeah i knew it would but i was hoping we’d it’d go a little bit slower but where are we at here like 20 minutes yeah um i got around 30 minutes sounds terrible yeah that’s not bad at all um yeah i don’t know where else to to go here no i think we covered it all i mean you know like we’ve mentioned before these kind of off topic or off movie i guess topics will be shorter and longer we don’t we don’t know how long they’re going to be we yeah they really come up with the ideas pretty much we have no idea how it’s going to roll out um but i mean i had fun with this one this was fun it was fun and if you guys have any ideas on how these movies could have wrapped up even faster anyways they could stop the villains even sooner let us know uh jeremy go ahead and give him all the social medias ways to let us know yeah so uh pretty much on all the social medias we have is we are marvel pod um so our facebook we have a page and a group uh we’re on twitter as we are marvel pod instagram we are marvel pod if you want to email us yes we we we have emails we are marvelpod and uh yeah those are the places to reach us yeah so if you have a way that they could have stopped the villains you know or some other pithy funny thing that could happen in these movies let us know we’d love to hear it yeah we would um but you wanna talk about what we’re gonna do for our next episode i will talk about what we’re going to do for our next episode because it’s going to be one of mine and it’s going to be if the villains were the heroes of the film and the heroes were the villains of the film yes which should be a lot of fun yeah um we’re gonna pick four different movies a piece and we actually picked different movies which we did i was quite surprised by i thought we’d have at least one you know crossover or leap over i did too yeah when you sent me your list i was like oh i didn’t copy him that’s a first then i got a laurie i was like oh maybe i should have copied him and we’re going to do basically elevator pitches like we did for our sequel pitches and uh tell you a version of the movie how it would take place if the villain was the actual hero of the piece so i’m excited for that one yeah and that’ll be out next week yeah so yeah listen to that one and well if you’re listening to this you listen to this one so thank you and thank you for listening to this absolutely so until next week i’ve been justin ivan jeremy and we will see you next time bye bye that’s cute we did at the same time oh hello everyone it’s time for a quick ad break head on over to that’s spelled i-l-l-u-m-i-n-e-r-d-i dot-com for all of your nerdy news they’ve broken some big mcu scoops lately and covers so much more including movies tv comics and horror so go visit today